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I have had cats in my life for most of my adult life. A cat definitely has their own way of showing that they love you. By nature cats are territorial but not pack animals. There is a hierarchy among groups of feral cats, but mostly they are known for their independent nature. Cats also each have their own personality. Some are more affectionate than others but there are always telltale signs that your cat does love you.
There are many subtle ways cats communicate their love and trust in you. Does your furry friend like to sleep near or on you? Most of the time this cat of mine is my shadow. So if your feline is always by your side it is safe to assume he loves you. Does your cat cry for you or chirp? Cats develop a language to “talk” to only humans, they use other body languages to talk to each other. My cat Pizza also winks at me , a lot. It nice to have someone flirt with me, but after some research, I learned that he is really just telling me that he trusts me with his eyes. Cats give off pheromones and rub areas they consider their “territory” So yes, that head bump and leg rubbing is their way of marking you and saying “You are mine”
Do cats choose their owners
Given the option, we think so. There have been experiments behaviorists have theorized that the person’s voice, demeanor, or the way the person interacts with the cat is what entices the cat to choose them to be their owner. Cats don’t always choose the human that loves them back, at first. They can be discriminating and picky. We don’t really understand how they decide, but it is clear they have an opinion. Cats can read people and their emotions similarly to a dog. Are cats or kittens just really good at reading people? Many ferel cats survive just fine without a human. I have also have known families whose cat decided to find a new family and just leave. I have also had friends who were adopted by a neighborhood cat. Never fear though, once you have been chosen as the pick of their litter, you will be loved forever.
In a full household, with other pets and children, sometimes it is surprising who they choose. Years ago when my kids were little we adopted a kitten. My daughter was about 6yo. and a huge animal lover. Little girls love kittens, and this little kitten bonded with her almost immediately. He slept on her bed and would come when she called from just about anywhere in the house or yard. There were four other people at home including two dogs to choose from yet, she undeniably became his person. A little human clearly isn’t the best choice if the kitten was looking for security , food and shelter, but they formed a tight bond. I guess that could prove cats don’t just “love” or bond with a “caretaker”. They make their choice based on other reasons.
“The scientists found some correlations between human personality and the behaviors of the cats—such as that cats with humans classified as “extroverted” or “conscientious” exhibited more complex patters of behaviors—and concluded that “it seems that an important area of negotiation between the owner and the cat is mutual attention and friendly tactile interactions” and that the patterns in the relationships between the cats and humans resemble other long-term and complex relationships, “such as those between humans.”–Smithsonian magazine Feb 2011
Signs your cat has bonded with you
Body language can tell you a lot.
- Greeting you with a high head and tall happy tail
- Purring when you are around
- Grooming you. Yes, some cats try to offer a spa treatment cleaning your hair. You are family.
- Gentle biting or nipping
- Are you continually getting a kitty massage?
- Exposing their underbelly
- Chirping or meowing to or at you
- Vying for your attention when you are doing something else.
I’m sure there are many more unique ways cat owners know that their cat shows affection. Humans have been a sharing their life with cats for at least 9000 years. Yet, we have only recently begun to study a lot of their behaviors cats historically not good test subjects, that make it hard.
Ways to show your cat you love HIM
A good place to start is, just be yourself. Sometimes, it isn’t love at first sight, it takes a while to get to know each other and build trust. Spending quality time with your furry friend is a great place to start. If you are a new parent, just sitting on the floor with your new friend in the same room is a great start. Have a few toys and some catnip filled toys around.
Try to not overwhelm them with YOUR love. Let your new cat or kitten come to you. Not all felines are comfortable with lots of affection from you at first. Show them love and head rubs, but pay attention to their body language for clues or when they have had enough.
Talk to your friend and reassure them. It is possible cats choose their human based on the sound of your voice. I have a habit of chatting with my boy, and either cause or effect, Pizza has become a very vocal companion over the years.
Like all relationships, be consistent and communicate. Pick a time for daily playtime together. Share a treat together at the same time. Although cats are fairly independent, they also enjoy your company especially once they feel safe around you and consider you to be a family member. Adopting a small kitten under nine weeks is a good age to encourage bonding with a human. An older cat may take more time to warm up to you, but most cats eventually bond.
Cats do love and bond like other pets
Cats like to hang out with the people they love. It won’t take long to share that bond. Your new cat will love you in no time. Sitting with a cup of tea and cat snuggled up next to you is very peaceful and comforting.
I’m a busy blogger pet parent to my senior-aged cat Pizza. We have traveled all over Los Angeles, endured several moves, jobs, roommates and now global pandemic together. Today we write, learn, and share information and our favorite products, in hopes you can experience your best life with pets too, We currently live with other humans and their beautiful dog.